One person’s view: “What’s supposed to be funny about this? ... There’s absolutely nothing in this song to enjoy.” – Nerd with an Afro
The public’s view: 2.88 / 5.00
Before I begin today’s write-up, I want to mention that it is sometimes hard to separate opinions of a song from people’s feelings for the performer behind it. This is especially true when a hit record was made by someone who now has an odious reputation. Anita Bryant’s “Paper Roses” attracted some of the lousiest reviews of any top 10 hit from 1960, but I chose not to feature it here because I suspected that much of the criticism was directed at her personally rather than the song. I expect I’ll face a similar dilemma when I get to Chris Brown. Anyhow, in a totally unrelated development, Bill Cosby’s “Little Ole Man” is often listed among the worst hits of 1967. I have to agree that it’s a bit of a stinker.
“Little Ole Man” is the tale of a senior citizen who complains about being run over by a train and by a herd of elephants, and who then later admits that neither of those catastrophes actually occurred. We are never given a reason why he would lie about something so serious. Maybe it is a Jussie Smollett-style hoax intended to slander the Elephant-American community, or perhaps the man is hoping that the railroad will pay him a quick settlement without asking why he still has all of his limbs. Most likely, though, this is simply an elderly person who is very confused and should not be allowed outdoors by himself. Someone probably stepped on his toes in 1918, and the addled old man now misremembers this incident and exaggerates it into something more recent and far more threatening. Likening a minor foot-stepping to an elephant stampede is a stretch, even if the perpetrator was Fatty Arbuckle.
This is sometimes classified as a comedy recording because Cosby is a comedian and he tells the story as if it’s a joke. However, “Little Ole Man” is only slightly funnier than Ray Stevens’s “Ahab, the Arab”, and in some ways is an even more disappointing experience. For all its many faults, “Ahab” is at least kind enough to let us know right away what we are getting into. “Little Ole Man” toys with us for a bit before letting us down. The setup is promising and Cosby’s pacing is good, but then there is no payoff at the end – unless you think that an individual’s senility qualifies as a punch line. If laughter is the best medicine, Dr. Cliff Huxtable is lucky he didn’t have his prescription privileges revoked.
The use of Stevie Wonder’s “Uptight (Everything’s Alright)” as accompanying music is almost as baffling as the old man’s fibs. Wonder’s song had reached #3 on the Hot 100 a year earlier, and Bill Cosby wisely realized that he couldn’t improve on it. Nonetheless, he should have at least transformed it in some way instead of hiring a band to recreate it note-for-note. The target demographic for “Little Ole Man” was people whose copies of “Uptight” had gotten broken or lost in the preceding year, and who were now willing to settle for an inferior version with a rambling story about dementia where Stevie’s singing used to be. Somehow, there were enough consumers in this predicament for Cosby’s single to peak nearly as high on the charts as “Uptight”. I hope this served as a good lesson for everyone to take better care of their Stevie Wonder records.
My rating: 2 / 10
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